I’m not going to lie… I’m having a hard time today.
I’m just feeling a little frazzled, I feel unorganized… and it got me thinking about where we find support when we need it. Where do you turn when you need help getting back on track? I’m a recovering perfectionist and sometimes I still forget that I’m in recovery. I’m not perfect. My schedule is not perfect and the way I do things is not perfect.
Sometimes when I feel frazzled like I do today, I can almost become paralyzed. I literally stop in my tracks because I don’t know how to move forward. When we have so much to do, and think about and accomplish in a day, it just feels overwhelming. I’m always trying to get so much done while my kids are at school because I want to be able to turn on my “mommy” switch when they walk in that door. I want it to be all about them and I don’t want to be distracted by what’s going on.
My purpose of writing today is to make sure that y’all have a support system in place to lift you up when you’re feeling paralyzed and overwhelmed. One of the most important things I do with all of my clients is put them in a support group. It’s amazing how transformative that support can be when you’re leaning on others who identify with where you are. The support groups that I’m referring to are focused on healthy eating and working out, but you can apply the same system to any part of your life.
Last night I was just flat as flat can be. When I get too many things going on in my head and I can’t turn them off, I tend to kind of shut down. I don’t want to talk, I just want to lay on the couch. I just want to zone out to a TV show for a little while and then go to bed. That’s what happened last night. I just needed to get some sleep and start over today.
Today started out great, but as the day has gone on, I’ve started to feel a little frazzled. Often when I’m feeling this way, I look to my team for support. I just got done texting with one of the coaches on my team who just kind of helped me remember to breathe and lighten up a little bit. She probably doesn’t even know she helped me, but she did. And even more than just leaning on others for support, sometimes we just need to ask for help getting it all done. There are many, many times I reach out to my team to ask them to do things for me. Just making that checklist of tasks a bit smaller can instantly make you feel more at ease.
So often women, mothers, wives… we feel like we have to do it all. I guess I’m speaking to myself as much as I am to you today- remember to ask for help. Remember to look to the support system you have when you really need it. This isn’t a perfect journey. You’re not supposed to be perfect. It’s all supposed to be a work in progress, just make little steps along the way. As long as you keep trying, you will eventually succeed.
It’s so easy sometimes to give that advice to other people and not heed it ourselves. It’s easy to be there for someone when they need support, but it’s harder to ask for support when we need it. It can be hard to admit that we don’t completely have our act together. It’s hard to admit that we feel a little frazzled because it’s not a good feeling. When I feel frazzled, I feel like I’m failing. I don’t want to fail, so I hold those feelings of overwhelm inside. But failure is just part of the journey, isn’t it? I’m going to have to fail a little bit along the way in order to figure out what works best for me.
Do you feel this way sometimes? Right now, I’m going to say something to myself as much as I’m saying it to you- we’ve got to give ourselves grace. We beat ourselves up so often. We expect so much of ourselves. We expect to be able to hold the weight of the world on our shoulders. We expect to never need support. No! Everyone needs help along the way.
Before I even reach out to one of my friends or teammates for support, I get on my knees and ask God for support. I ask Him to help me with this mindset that I need to be perfect and do it all myself. I ask Him to help me reach out and ask for help from others. I ask Him to help me be ok asking for support. Let His support lift you up so you’re able to ask for the help you need from others.
I want all of you reading this to know that I’m here to support you too. They say it takes a village to raise a family and I completely agree with that. I also think it takes a village of support for all of us mamas to walk tall in this journey day after day. It takes a great support system to allow us to fall when we need to fall and just give us a soft place to land. Whether your life is in turmoil and you’re dealing with really big issues, or you’re just feeling a little overwhelmed and frazzled, we all need support.
Lean in and ask for support when you need it. Lean on those who support you when you need them. Rather than being afraid to ask for help, be grateful for those who will support you when you really, really need them. Breathe. Re-group. Start with a fresh perspective. I pray that this message reaches those who needed to hear it today and I pray that you will take advantage of the support that’s around you.
Y’all have a blessed day.